Sunday, April 15, 2012

Pour Out My Soul


When I was in elementary school my family, at the encouragement of my mom, decided to sponsor a child from Compassion International. Christine was the most faithful to writing our little girl in India named Annie. Annie's parents were missionaries and to this day are faithful to their ministry in loving God and loving others. Fortunately for us, Annie liked to write us back. I remember how exciting it was to receive a letter from Annie and how I always regretted I didn't write more. Thank God for Christine!

It was really sad when Annie was too old for us to sponsor anymore because we lost touch with her. Until...good ole Facebook! Annie found us, which was a miracle really. How cool is it that we're friends with her on Facebook and are able to see her little baby girl's smiling face over thousands and thousands of miles? Once Annie and I were reconnected I began to read her blog. She is very inspiring to me because she always seems so full of Hope and Joy.

Photo of Annie and her family taken at her daughter Gracia's christening.

Last summer Annie wrote a post about Hannah from the Bible. I never really read Hannah's story but knew she was a woman who struggled with infertility. After reading Annie's post I read the story for myself and was struck how admirable it was that Hannah poured her heart out to the Lord. She told Him her desires.

From 1 Samuel 1:9-17 it says:

Once when they had finished eating and drinking in Shiloh, Hannah stood up. Now Eli the priest was sitting on his chair by the doorpost of the LORD’s house. In her deep anguish Hannah prayed to the LORD, weeping bitterly. And she made a vow, saying, “LORD Almighty, if you will only look on your servant’s misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head.”

As she kept on praying to the LORD, Eli observed her mouth. Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk and said to her, “How long are you going to stay drunk? Put away your wine.”

“Not so, my lord,” Hannah replied, “I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the LORD. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief.”

Eli answered, “Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of him.” 

She poured her soul out to the Lord! I am a coward in this area. Somehow, I have these strange fears of the Lord hearing my prayer and denying my request. He continues to prove His love for me, yet I still don't trust Him. I want to learn how to "pour my soul out to the Lord!" I remember there were times in my life when I did and how freeing it was. The next time I am troubled, please remind me of this story. I want to live this one out.



This is such an amazing story. Praise God for Annie and your family loving her!

I hope we will always remind each other of this important part of our faith. "Freeing" is a great word to describe how it feels when we just let it out, give it to Him, and be done with it! (And let's hope when we're 80 we can look back on 40 years of faithfully living this out.)



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  2. wow... i loved reading this... i remember how excited I was every time i received a letter from you... Christine was real sweet... she wud send me stickers and bookmarks and pictures of all of you... i still have them and the letters wid me... tht goes to show how much it meant to me... my sister had sponsors too but for some reason her sponsors changed almost every year... and i remember feeling so happy n proud tht yu guys stayed wid me all thru school... i enjoyed writing to you... and i remember i used to draw pictures too :) yu will always be very special to me. God blessed me thru you and may you be a channel of blessing to many many more...
    - Annie

    1. Wow! Very cool that you kept all the letters and pictures. You sound like Christine. ; ) I pray some day we can meet in person!!